A Matter of Attention

Well, Spring is here and summer is on the way. (At least I think it is.) And guess what else is here. Less, shorter, lower, tighter, more, smaller. If you want to know the nouns that go with the adjectives: material, shorts & skirts, tops, clothes, skin, bathing suits. And I've probably already upset someone. But I think it's important to talk about. There is MUCH that could be said, but I want to focus here on attention.

Dads: your wife and daughters need attention. The right kind. From you. They need your love and affection and care and provision and leadership and protection. It has to start with the men. We live in a society where the definition of marriage is apparently up for grabs, many dads are absentee, some kids don't even know who their father is, some fathers are workaholics and fail to spend time with their kids and wife, and other dads are around but don't know or just don't care about how to treat their wife and daughters. Is it any wonder in a society full of father failure that girls are looking for attention somewhere else? Well, no; that's not a surprise. So how do they get that attention?

Culture says and shows that to dress a certain way (see paragraph 1) brings attention. Never mind that it's the wrong kind of attention. Never mind that it comes from guys who would like to use your body for a night and then be done with you. Never mind that the kind of attention that comes - lustful, temporary, selfish - is the opposite of the kind of attention a father should give - truly loving, permanent, and selfless. Never mind that the a faithful father's attention is a reflection of that of Christ: selfless, never-failing love that is concerned for the well being of the object of that attention. But guess what. Culture is right. You'll get attention. Sadly, we notice.

But guys, let's not pretend like we have the moral high ground. The way a woman dresses is no excuse to give this kind of attention to her. Every lingering glance at the woman that just walked by reinforces the wrong kind of attention getting. Every lust induced search for trash online contributes to an industry that promotes the wrong kind of attention getting and giving. Look a girl in the eyes; show concern for her heart, her well-being; have a real conversation with her. Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church (gave himself up for her; not used her for his own desires). 

And ladies. Which kind of attention do you want? If you have a dad or a husband who has loved you well, praise God and be content! If you want easy, selfish attention, understand what kind of guys will give you that attention. It's not the kind of guy who will show you true, lasting, selfless love and affection. He's potentially your worst nightmare. But girls, don't give up hope: "...let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." (1 Peter 3:4) By God's grace put some of that on when you get up in the morning. And even if no man has ever paid you the right kind of attention; even if you don't have a dad or he's distant, there is a heavenly Father paying attention to you. He is mighty to save. Does he have your attention?

It is increasingly rare in our world to be seeking and giving the right kind of attention. Will we be part of the problem or solution?