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Guilt, no compassion, or a better way?

8/18/2021

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*Tap, tap, tap* Hello? Looks like the blog feature of the website does still work. How 'bout that? 

Not many mornings ago, I was feeling a sense of, well, I'm not sure what exactly: a combination of guilt, being overwhelmed, wondering what I could (or should) do about some pretty ugly and sad things happening in our world. 

As many of you have, I'd seen some horrific news coming out of Afghanistan. At a humanitarian level what is  or will be happening to Afghans, US citizens remaining there, allies of the US, Christians, women, and others who find themselves on the wrong side of the Taliban's naughty/nice ledger is appalling. The pandemic is still a thing with all of it's attendant suffering. An earthquake in Haiti had left hundreds dead and thousands more homeless and fearful. On top of these global things, a local acquaintance recently had to leave their home because it had become a physically toxic, uninhabitable place to live. His words in a text: "We are in bad shape here & struggling to hang on."

As I sat in my comfortable chair, in my air-conditioned home, bills paid, free to worship according to my faith and conscience, and relatively healthy, I had the feeling I mention above: overwhelmed, guilty, wondering what I could/should do. I suspect I may not be the only one feeling something similar (if not now, then perhaps under other circumstances you've faced). Here are some principles I think we can bring to bear at times like these. I'll divide them into two categories seeking to alleviate false guilt but keeping us on the hook where we should be.

Avoid false guilt

  1. You have to live where God put you. I was born in the USA, and for now God has put me in Warsaw, Indiana, not Kabul, Afghanistan. There's no guilt in that.
  2. You must fulfill the responsibilities God has given you in the place he's put you. If you neglect your family to take care of someone else, somewhere else, someone will have to use their resources to take care of those you have neglected.
  3. You can't do everything. Period. I've written about this before.
  4. Trust the wise, good, sovereign God. None of it is outside his plan and control.

Don't avoid showing genuine, tangible compassion
  1. Just because you must provide for your family doesn't mean that have to have the biggest, best, and most. If there's not room in your budget for the financial side of compassionately helping others, it may be time to make some budget cuts. Sacrificial giving is, well, sacrificial. Give generously.
  2. You can't do everything, but you can and should do something. And if you don't plan in advance to do something, you probably won't. And the guilt will come with every new crisis. One very practical way to plan is with a budget. Besides what you give to the church, do you have a line in your budget for showing compassion and help to those in need? And do you have any margin in your schedule to be able to show up when someone needs your help?
  3. I saw someone recently say something along the lines of "think globally, act locally,"  That's maybe not perfect, but it's good. You should know and be sympathetic towards those suffering in Afghanistan and Haiti, but you may not be able to directly impact what's happening there. You can tangibly help your neighbor.
  4. Pray. This is crucial. It's not last in the list because it's an afterthought. It is literally how you enter into work all around the globe. So you actually can directly impact what's going on in places far beyond your physical reach.

This is clearly not an exhaustive list. Just some thoughts. Feel free to add yours in the comments here or on social media. The goal is not to leave us feeling neat, tidy, and unmoved by suffering. I hope we deeply sympathize with those who suffer. Then we want to funnel that sympathy into proper compassionate action without feeling needlessly guilty. If you're doing nothing, there's a problem. If you're overwhelmed with guilt about things beyond your control, there's a problem. As with so many things we need balance. God help us.
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